Irish Time

Tuesday, July 17, 2012

Wenlock and Mandeville Olympic Undercover IRA Moles Targeted by British Army

Wenlock and Mandeville Targeted to be Whacked or Interned Without Trial in British Occupied Ireland Concentration Camp.

The BBC was nothing but a front for Lord Muck and the IRA an evil spying network of murderers. New documents have revealed.  that Wenlock and Mandeville, two ex-employees of the now defunct BBC 606 and the official mascots for the 2012 Summer Olympics being held in London 2012, have unmasked the two Irish moles as agents working for the IRA, who have burrowed their way deep undercover of the radioactive Olympic Stadium, ready to explode at the closing ceremony.

New devastating evidence proves what Tory leaders have been saying for years, that the BBC is nothing but lies and propaganda, that even watching it is tantamount to treachery, and the only way to find out the truth is to watch government briefings on Gerry Adam's TV in British Occupied Ireland. Documents covering the period from September1971 to 9 May this year, indicate a contact between someone who may have been in IRA intelligence officer and someone whose name is very similar to a man that started work as a cleaner at the Olympic Stadium.

 "This damning level of infiltration into the Olympics is simply unbelievable," said one MI5 intelligence officer. "It is simply inconceivable. My brain is beginning to hurt as we speak. But I'm not in the least surprised. We now know that Wenlock and Mandeville spent all the money they earned at the BBC and from selling weapons of mass destruction to terrorists, on producing propaganda and speading lies for ex-colleagues working at the BBC."

The cleaner who used to also work for the BBC, would have had access to the inner workings of the BBC in the evenings, when everyone had gone home, it was revealed. It is not difficult to see how, using coded messages secreted inside BBC 606 broomhandles and bin-liners, he could have edited footage, to make it look like the Irish in British Occupied Ireland, weren't happy about UK troops liberating them. Pictures of dead innocent Irish were thought to have been mocked up during tea breaks in staff 
canteen by Wenlock and Mandeville who are also believed to have hacked into the BBC's computer system, with the full knowledge of the management and rewritten the next day's news announcements to include lies and propaganda and dirty nasty filth about the UK government. Despite listening to their own rewritten reports, BBC editors didn't twig because their brains were so addled from hookah pipes, prostitutes and Irish propaganda fed into their brains from the age of two, one expert revealed.

A search of Wenlock and Mandeville's lockers at the Olympic Stadium by UK special forces at the weekend, also revealed several containers of dangerous chemicals and five dirty bombs, proof that they were also manufacturing biological and nuclear weapons from all the contaminated radioactive soil spread around the Olympic Stadium. Incredibly, the documents also prove that Osama bin Laden was also in control of the BBC for years and so Wenlock and Mandeville must have been best friends with Osama up to the time of his death, said a professor of logical deduction at Oxford.

The news that agents from intelligence services have attempted to infiltrate news organisations like the BBC has shocked media pundits worldwide. "I can't believe it," said the former head of MI5. "We have one over-riding rule here in London never interfere with the democratic rights of the media and freedom of speech. It just shows how low Wenlock and Mandeville are willing to go. I am outraged. If there's one thing we won't stand it is MI5 or MI6 agents working as British journalists. The media must be allowed to present information in whatever way it likes without any interference from us. Now I must go, I've got an Olympic report to edit, hearts, minds, the empire and all that, old chap."

Ms.Givings, speaking from the new Palace on the Thames, confirmed she has been hard at work creating a treble agent to infiltrate the Wenlock and Mandeville terrorist network at the Olympics. "After a hard day on the wards with director Stanley Kubrick who withdrew his 1971 epic Clockwork Orange, despite its status as an Irish art-house classic of the genre, I spent quite some time introducing Wenlock and Mandeville to sapphic love. I have loved women in the past and slept with them too. I think if you love and want to  pleasure a woman, particularly if you are a woman yourself, then certainly you know how to do things in a certain way." 

Ms Givings was indeed no slouch in the girl-on-girl department according to one furry cup guru "It tends to be the case that normal lesbians or bisexual moles may not perhaps be as well endowed as Ms. Givings in the phwoaaar department make indifferent lovers. Ms. Givings, on the other hand, can  lead a whimpering partner to a shattering climax within seconds, before continuing to work the trembling recipient for days, if not weeks.However as I expressed my doubts to MsGivings, she became increasingly agitated. I had, she insisted, completely missed the point. The debate became  increasingly acrimonious until, incredibly, a furious MsGivings pulled down her shorts and proceeded to urinate onto two expensive copies of Wenlock and Mandeville, while one of her M15 spokesperson colleagues Rebekah "Basher" Wade, lay underneath licking her lips.

Personally I think they should both have been sent home pending psychiatric evaluation. And while I am prepared to admit a certain sympathy with some  peoples' love of the outdoor life, the Olympics and all that, I insisted that water sports are deadly. However they both said their tipping point was the exclusion of that golden boy of English soccer David Beckham from playing at the Olympics. MsGivings said "I don't think I'll ever work for MI5 again," she was visibly-shaken as she sat tearfully clutching  a picture of Posh and Becks atop two jewel-encrusted thrones on their wedding day in 1999. "I'm on tablets from the doctor. It's me nerves,"
she explained, before breaking down entirely and blubbering uncontrollably into a English replica shirt.

Beckham apparently was not included in the Olympic team because he engaged in a golden shower with Rebecca Loos and one of her friends, had sold graphic text conversations between the pair to a UK tabloid. "He can't speak at the moment," said spokesperson Rebekah Wade. "He's already smashed up the flat and right now Nancy's holding him by his feet while he tries to get out to play some football" M15 spokesperson Rebekah "Basher" Wade defended the deployment of Jordan's WMCs (Weapons of Mass Circulation to unmask Wenlock and Mandeville ): "The girl's a  national institution. Those Irish have targeted England's premier piece as well as our Olympic showpiece. 

I am neither Gaeilgeoir nor Catholic - but I am still Irish

 JAMES JOYCE in Portrait of the Artist says: “When the soul of man is born in this country there are nets flung at it to hold it back from flight. You talk to me of nationality, language, religion. I shall try to fly by those nets.”PATRICK SEMPLE
During my life I have had a sense of wanting to “fly by those nets”, to avoid the constraints of nationality, language and religion.
My family came to Ireland in the early 19th century from Scotland. My paternal grandfather was in the army in Ireland and in India. Having come home from the famous Nile expedition, he was posted to Wexford, where he died in 1909. I was born there 30 years later.
My parents, who were adult in 1922, as citizens gave the new State their full, but not uncritical, loyalty. Since I was a boy I have wanted to free myself from the narrow, self-conscious and extravagant national pride all around me.
I was born just 17 years after Independence, so as I grew up, I heard at every turn the espousal of Ireland and everything Irish, but always felt that self praise is no praise. Some teachers indoctrinated children with a nationalism that amounted to hatred of Britain – and we wonder why violent republicanism still rears its ugly head.
I once heard a language enthusiast on radio say that unless you spoke Irish, you were not a proper Irishman. According to this principle, I am numbered among the 95 per cent or more defective Irish people. However I am in favour of preserving the spoken language as far as possible.
Two native-speaker friends independently told me that sometimes so bad is the Irish on radio and television that they have to turn it off. Having been brought up a member of the Church of Ireland in the post-Independence period of triumphalist Catholicism, I was made to feel an outsider. For so many people, in Ireland and outside, Irish is synonymous with Roman Catholic. Brendan Corish, leader of the Labour Party in the 1960s, went even further and said publicly: “I am a Catholic first and an Irishman second.”
I resented being seen by fellow countrymen as being Irish but not the full shilling. I resented that being Irish, foreigners expected me to sit lightly to the law and to have an ongoing affair with alcohol. How then am I Irish?
I am Irish pure and simple. I am as Irish as the most extreme republican, as the greatest enthusiast for and most fluent speaker of the Irish language and as the most fervent Catholic.
I am neither proud nor ashamed of it. I am glad I am Irish and I know I could never live contentedly outside Ireland.
There are characteristics of Irish people that I appreciate: generosity to the afflicted, welcome to the stranger, relaxed approach to living and a particular sense of humour. However, none of these is exclusive to our people.
We are not God’s gift to the world. We are one of a multitude of peoples on the planet who live together within particular national boundaries. There are characteristics of many Irish people I do not appreciate: for example, the selfishness of being so laid back as to be unreliable and believing that the destructive use of alcohol is funny.
I’m not a Kerry republican, a Dublin 4 nationalist or an Ulster or any other kind of unionist. I’m not a Gaeilgeoir or a Catholic.
On the other hand I am not Anglo Irish in any sense – I don’t possess or ever did possess, a horse! Neither have I an emotional home in England. I don’t want to be other than Irish. I am simply a human being who was born on the island of Ireland – and I’m glad that I was.

Patrick Semple is a former Church of Ireland clergyman and writer. He teaches creative writing at NUIM His website is

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